Ten Minutes

I had the most efficient and painless encounter with government bureaucracy today. It was amazing.

Some History

So fifteen-plus years ago, Texas’ Department of Transportation (TXDOT) was doing specialized license plates for Texas universities. LSU fans began thinking, we should see if we can get specialized plates as well. The two largest alumni bases outside the state of Louisiana are in Houston and Dallas, respectively. The alumni associations reached out to TXDOT. The reply was, “Get 1,900 auto owners to commit by paying in advance, and we’ll do it.” And the LSU faithful responded.

So my wife and I each got LSU “Geaux Tigers” Texas license plates; the first out-of-state institution to do so. (Suck it, OU.) These have moved to each new vehicle we’ve gotten over the years. Until this past year-ish.

Last year, my wife got a new SUV, but we kept the minivan she’d been driving, rather than trade it in. The minivan retained the LSU plates, and her SUV got standard Texas ones. Kid2 then got to have the minivan as his primary vehicle as he got more and more comfortable behind the wheel.

But the minivan was reaching the end of its Odyssey. (Why yes, it was, in fact, a Honda.) It had reached a point where the major repairs that would probably be a good idea were more than the minivan was worth. And Kid2 goes to a private school for students with learning difficulties that is a 30-minute drive from our house without traffic. So those two things coupled together elevated my wife’s anxiety over Kid2 driving so far in the old minivan.

Said anxiety reached its peak one Friday evening, when Kid2 drove to the heart of Dallas to meet some friends for a movie, and he drove during rush hour.

“Is it him driving down there during rush hour on a Friday that bugs you, or him driving down there during rush hour on a Friday in the minivan?”

“The latter.”

So it was time to replace the minivan.

“Do we get a new (to him) vehicle for him, or do we get one for me and let him have my Highlander?”

“You can get a new car.”

“Good, because I’ve been researching and filing away vehicles for the past six months.”

Never say I don’t pay attention to my wife’s emotions and feelings. I saw this coming.

So we donate the minivan, say good-bye to it and its set of LSU plates, and I get a new SUV.

But we’re keeping the Highlander. Which has my LSU plates. I didn’t think to ask the dealership about swapping plates, and honestly, that sounded like a hassle they wouldn’t be happy to deal with and probably shouldn’t. So we went through the normal procedures, and my new SUV got standard Texas plates.

Getting the LSU plates on my new ride

Meanwhile, I did research on TXDOT’s web site on if we could swap license plates on two vehicles we own, and yes, you can.

But.

You can’t do this online. It has to be done at person. Oh no. Time spent at the DMV.

Only this particular matter isn’t handled at the DMV, it’s handled at your county’s tax assessor office. And in Denton County, they have multiple such offices. And you can book appointments online. Joy.

My appointment was today at 2:00pm. I roll in at 10 minutes til, thinking it’s going to be packed, there will be a wait, and I’ll probably see someone closer to 2:30pm, if that. Because government bureaucracy.

I check in the kiosk, elect to have SMS alerts sent to my phone to tell me when it’s my turn. The seating area is packed. The overflow seating area in the building’s main lobby is nearly full. I elect to do tiny laps in the main lobby.

I don’t get even a full lap in before my phone pings that it’s my turn. It’s 1:52pm when I get to window and the delightful (honest, this isn’t sarcasm) lady behind it.

I tell her what I’m there for, she gets my info pulled up, no problem, we can take care of that.

“Oh, you have specialized plates.”

“Yes, that’s why I’m here. My teenager doesn’t need my college alma mater license plates.” She grins at that.

“Okay, so we can’t do a straight swap then. The Highlander will have to get new plates.”

And I instantly deflated. Of course. This is going to be a process, and it’s not going to be wrapped up today, is it? Because government bureaucracy.

“Just fill out this form, and I’ll get you the new plates.”

WHAT?!? Right here? Right now?

I fill out the form; it’s short, only 5 items to fill in, then sign. Clackety-clack goes the keyboard. She pulls 2 new plates (in Texas we have front and back plates) off the cubby on the side desk, prints out new registrations with the window stickers, I pay the small (less than $5) fee, and I’m done.

It’s 2:02pm as I’m walking out the door and texting my wife my amazement at how utterly easy that was.

Lessons Learned

As always, be polite to the bureaucrats, especially when they in turn are polite and cheerfully engaging. Makes the process smoother.

And two, if given the opportunity to make an appointment, do so. It appears the crowd I witnessed were walk-ins, and appointment holders were given priority.

I worked extra hours earlier in the week to minimize the personal time I would have to take off work for this, because I figured government bureaucracy. And so now I had the rest of the afternoon to get the plates and stickers swapped on the vehicles and chill.

Really delightful.